Jesuse the Masseuse
Owns a pet moose.
He sits on his own,
drinking his juice.
He reads of Spain's truce
in a good Dr. Seuss.
His goose worships Zeus
with a big branch of spruce.
When he plays cards (with Bruce)
wild is the deuce.
Jesuse the Masseuse's
goose is out loose.
So he puts on a noose.
(He's pseudo suicidal)
[All spelling and punctuation faithfully recreated from my journal]
06 September 2012
19 August 2012
OmNomNom: Scotch Eggs
You know what I love about scotch eggs? (Besides their ease, simplicity, convenience and delicious flavor?) Even hard boiled eggs this ugly:
End up this pretty:
And it's way, way, ridiculously simple.
We own a Butterball electric turkey fryer. If you've ever wanted to try frying a turkey, but were scared of oil fires, this is the unit to buy. Really. Every so often, we like to fry up something other than a turkey though. And when it's out, I do many things, because it's just easier that way. Tonight, I made a deep fried chicken, with sweet potato fries, and I experimented with frying some brussels sprouts (I broiled the rest, as usual). While it was out, I made these breakfast balls of awesome, too.
First, you need the boiled eggs. I use this recipe by Alton Brown, Because Alton Brown is amazing (I don't care if you disagree). But any method works.
Then, you need loose sausage. You can be lame and use a roll from the grocery store, but we like the good stuff from the farmer's market, which we season simply with salt, pepper, and paprika. You can use anything you want, really: sage, oregano, garlic, whatever you like.
Finally, you need breadcrumbs. Seasoned or not, your choice, style doesn't matter. I like the crunch of panko.
Now take a small ball of sausage, and sort of make a dip in it.
Then, place the egg in the middle and try to ease the sausage around it in a more or less even layer.
Roll it around in the bread crumbs until coated.
Repeat until sausage is gone, or you run out of eggs. I ran out of sausage first.
Drop them in your briskly rolling oil (I heat my machine to 375 Fahrenheit).
Fry for about 5 min or so.
They should look like this:
If the sausage has pulled away from the egg in places? Oh well!
Let cool for a bit, then tuck in! They're great the next day, too. Reheat in the toaster oven, or eat cold.
OmNomNom.
And it's way, way, ridiculously simple.
We own a Butterball electric turkey fryer. If you've ever wanted to try frying a turkey, but were scared of oil fires, this is the unit to buy. Really. Every so often, we like to fry up something other than a turkey though. And when it's out, I do many things, because it's just easier that way. Tonight, I made a deep fried chicken, with sweet potato fries, and I experimented with frying some brussels sprouts (I broiled the rest, as usual). While it was out, I made these breakfast balls of awesome, too.
First, you need the boiled eggs. I use this recipe by Alton Brown, Because Alton Brown is amazing (I don't care if you disagree). But any method works.
Finally, you need breadcrumbs. Seasoned or not, your choice, style doesn't matter. I like the crunch of panko.
Now take a small ball of sausage, and sort of make a dip in it.
Roll it around in the bread crumbs until coated.
Drop them in your briskly rolling oil (I heat my machine to 375 Fahrenheit).
Fry for about 5 min or so.
They should look like this:
Let cool for a bit, then tuck in! They're great the next day, too. Reheat in the toaster oven, or eat cold.
08 July 2012
Nerdy Knits: Potter Alphabet for Knitting
I have been knitting some Hogwarts inspired items lately, and wanted to incorporate lettering. I looked high and low, but, to my astonishment, I couldn't find anyone who had charted the lettering for my knitting use. Therefore, I have spent the last couple of days hunched over my laptop, recreating, as faithfully as possible, the iconic Potter font in knit chart form. I know my fellow crafty fans will make great use of it, so I wanted to freely give it to you.
With a few exceptions (M, W, etc...) I have tried to block them in a simple 15x15 grid. This might make smaller items impossible, but you can't get a whole lot smaller without losing too much detail. If there is demand, I can post individual letters, but the resolution will be the same. I hope you guys enjoy using these!
Update:
I have also posted a chart for a Twilight inspired font for the Twi-hards, and a Doctor Who font for you Whovians.
With a few exceptions (M, W, etc...) I have tried to block them in a simple 15x15 grid. This might make smaller items impossible, but you can't get a whole lot smaller without losing too much detail. If there is demand, I can post individual letters, but the resolution will be the same. I hope you guys enjoy using these!
Update:
I have also posted a chart for a Twilight inspired font for the Twi-hards, and a Doctor Who font for you Whovians.
31 May 2012
DDP Says "Own Your Life"
I have a confession to make. I have no idea how to be an adult. I am rapidly closing in on 30, I want to have kids, I have a house and a hubby, but I am still a gigantic child. I never take responsibility for my actions, I procrastinate, I'm stubborn and irrational, and I refuse to take care of the basics of living. Now along comes DDP with his yoga and his philosophies, promising me better health if I just commit to it and "own my life."
What does that even mean? How do I do that? I am still trying to figure out who I am and what I really want. How can I own a question mark? I've never taken care of myself because I have never had to. I've had people take care of me, pander to me, and support my every terrible decision. I'm basically an immature mess.
This blog is the only thing I have going for me. The idea that people are watching what I do, and maybe taking some sort of inspiration from it, is about the only thing that is keeping me on any semblance of a path. Every hit I see added to my page stats tells me that someone is reading, and makes me feel like maybe I can help. Because they say that if you want to really learn something, you should teach it. I guess that's what this blog is to me.
If my ramblings about life and self-esteem and healing have even the chance of giving someone else hope, I will keep plowing forward. Maybe in the end, owning your life isn't about knowing where it's headed, or really even just making things happen. Maybe it's about owning the mistakes and the setbacks, the hesitations and doubts, the faults and the flaws. Because these things ARE me.
I have a favorite quote: "When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be." (Lao Tzu) I have to own the past, and not let it become my future. I have to know what I am holding onto, so that I can let it go. This is my life, this is it, all of me. I am what I have done, and what I will do. But that is up to me. There is no one else who is going to come to the rescue. My life is mine to make of it what I will. Is that what it means to own it?
What does that even mean? How do I do that? I am still trying to figure out who I am and what I really want. How can I own a question mark? I've never taken care of myself because I have never had to. I've had people take care of me, pander to me, and support my every terrible decision. I'm basically an immature mess.
This blog is the only thing I have going for me. The idea that people are watching what I do, and maybe taking some sort of inspiration from it, is about the only thing that is keeping me on any semblance of a path. Every hit I see added to my page stats tells me that someone is reading, and makes me feel like maybe I can help. Because they say that if you want to really learn something, you should teach it. I guess that's what this blog is to me.
If my ramblings about life and self-esteem and healing have even the chance of giving someone else hope, I will keep plowing forward. Maybe in the end, owning your life isn't about knowing where it's headed, or really even just making things happen. Maybe it's about owning the mistakes and the setbacks, the hesitations and doubts, the faults and the flaws. Because these things ARE me.
I have a favorite quote: "When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be." (Lao Tzu) I have to own the past, and not let it become my future. I have to know what I am holding onto, so that I can let it go. This is my life, this is it, all of me. I am what I have done, and what I will do. But that is up to me. There is no one else who is going to come to the rescue. My life is mine to make of it what I will. Is that what it means to own it?
22 May 2012
Body Clutter Chapter 4
This chapter is all about the lies we tell, both to others and to ourselves. How many "reasons" do you have for not getting off the couch? For why you need to order Chinese instead of cooking something nutritious? Believe me, I've used them all, and they are not reasons. They are excuses. Let's look at my biggest two:
"I'm in too much pain to cook." That's a biggie, and borders on legitimate. The pain in my kidneys does restrict me from doing things SOMEtimes. But why can't I pre-cook good meals to freeze on days I'm feeling okay? It isn't any harder to throw a casserole in the oven than it is a pizza.
"I'm too tired to exercise." Whose fault is that but mine? It is LACK of exercise that ultimately exhausts us. We need to move, so that our bodies can more efficiently make energy. A little push now, and I will be in much better condition later. Nothing worth having is easy, especially at first.
What are yours? Are you too busy? Too hungry to wait? Is it too hot/cold to go outside? Those are roadblocks that we construct to keep us from doing what we know is right. I bought my copy of Body Clutter secondhand, and it has some underlining. One of the things that the previous owner highlighted was "...our excuses reveal a lack of character on our part, an ugly dent in our personal integrity." Um, ouch. That really hits too close to home for me.
No questions this chapter, just a request to write down your biggest excuses, which I have started above. Others include "I'm just overwhelmed." "I need a minute" (that never comes). "I have nothing to wear." "I just need a nap first." "I don't have time/a ride/the money to go get my prescription filled." "I don't know where to start."
Well, as far as the last one goes, I'm starting here and now. I'm tackling my bad attitudes, and conquering my fears. I am taking baby-steps towards having a clean kitchen stocked with healthy foods. I am committing to moving my body everyday, and taking care of it with the medicines it needs.
BTW guys, I THRIVE on comments, so please, don't be afraid to leave some. Such as, what are some of your excuses for not living as fully and healthfully as you know you should?
"I'm in too much pain to cook." That's a biggie, and borders on legitimate. The pain in my kidneys does restrict me from doing things SOMEtimes. But why can't I pre-cook good meals to freeze on days I'm feeling okay? It isn't any harder to throw a casserole in the oven than it is a pizza.
"I'm too tired to exercise." Whose fault is that but mine? It is LACK of exercise that ultimately exhausts us. We need to move, so that our bodies can more efficiently make energy. A little push now, and I will be in much better condition later. Nothing worth having is easy, especially at first.
What are yours? Are you too busy? Too hungry to wait? Is it too hot/cold to go outside? Those are roadblocks that we construct to keep us from doing what we know is right. I bought my copy of Body Clutter secondhand, and it has some underlining. One of the things that the previous owner highlighted was "...our excuses reveal a lack of character on our part, an ugly dent in our personal integrity." Um, ouch. That really hits too close to home for me.
No questions this chapter, just a request to write down your biggest excuses, which I have started above. Others include "I'm just overwhelmed." "I need a minute" (that never comes). "I have nothing to wear." "I just need a nap first." "I don't have time/a ride/the money to go get my prescription filled." "I don't know where to start."
Well, as far as the last one goes, I'm starting here and now. I'm tackling my bad attitudes, and conquering my fears. I am taking baby-steps towards having a clean kitchen stocked with healthy foods. I am committing to moving my body everyday, and taking care of it with the medicines it needs.
BTW guys, I THRIVE on comments, so please, don't be afraid to leave some. Such as, what are some of your excuses for not living as fully and healthfully as you know you should?
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