When CEO of Abercrombie and Fitch, Mike Jeffries, recently went on record as saying that he only wants "beautiful people" to work and shop at his stores, the internet exploded. Apparently, his definition of beauty is very narrow, and does not include the average size woman or larger, or any large male who is non-athletic. For the last week or so, I have seen meme after meme accusing him of hypocrisy by attacking his physical appearance, as he is older, maybe just a touch out of shape and has had extensive "work" done on his face. I admit to posting one or two of them myself.
Today, I want to apologize to Mike Jeffries. When we criticize someone for judging people's worth through looks and then turn around and do the same, we are missing the point. So, sir who will never read this, I am sorry for subjecting you to the same hateful rhetoric you have been spewing. No one should ever have to be made to feel they are not beautiful. I am so sorry that we have perpetuated the culture of judgment while calling for its end. It is wrong-headed and mean.
I also want to apologize to myself for letting my standards slip when I participated in attacking a person for their external appearance. It was childish and I am ashamed of myself. There is never any good reason to do so, and we are only seeking to justify a morally reprehensible act by wrapping it in moral outrage. It is NOT okay. I'm going to have to dig deep to figure out why I let myself get caught in a mob mentality and break my own ethical rules.
Yes, what Mr. Jeffries said was awful, but I suspect it belies a deeper hurt. He acts like a child desperately putting others down to make himself feel better. His history of cosmetic surgery shows a deep and abiding discomfort in his own skin. I suspect he does not truly see himself as beautiful, and so he lashes out from pain and tries to bring others down. By retaliating, we have only ensured his continued self-hatred and misanthropy.
Or maybe he's just a dick. Either way, insulting his looks isn't going to help a thing.
Call him out for his insensitive remarks. Call him out for his exclusionary and shallow business practices. Call him out for making bland, overpriced clothing. But don't make fun of his looks. Don't be a bully. Don't perpetuate a culture of appearance-based judgment.
Don't sink to his level.
Showing posts with label beauty. Show all posts
Showing posts with label beauty. Show all posts
15 May 2013
16 May 2012
Body Clutter Chapter 2
I am really bad at his whole "consistency" thing, aren't I? It's been a busy couple of days, but I am back.
Chapter 2 is about the lies that the "diet" industry sells us. They want you to believe that there really is a shortcut, and theirs is the path to salvation from obesity. Then, when it fails, they are right there to sell you a new snake oil because *this time* will be different. I cannot tell you how much this affected me, or for how long. And I know it isn't just me. We are bombarded with so many images of people who succeed on these programs, that the only conclusion we are left with is that *we* are the ones to blame, the ones who failed.
This, friends, is BULLSH*T. The simple truth is that there is no quick fix, no shortcut to health (and really, do I even have to say it? The focus should be on health, NOT weight or size). We are being lied to daily, and we are living the lies as if they are truth. Then why are we failing? Because successful weight loss means we don't need them anymore. A healthier person doesn't need a new miracle diet or pill or surgery. Why would an industry that makes millions off of people with low self-image want to improve that image?
Several questions this chapter. First, what is your image of beautiful? Mine is having a body strong enough to love my hubby, spoil my nieces and nephews and keep my home clean. Caring about myself enough to shower daily (yes, I am depressed and skip days, no, I don't care what you think of that). Being healthy enough to carry my clean laundry up to the second floor from the basement without being winded. Maintaining my loving nature, and developing some humility and patience. My idea of beauty truly comes from the inside.
Next: what diets and such have you tried and how did you do? I played a lot of soccer as a child, also did some weight training at the YMCA. I did well with both, not really getting thinner, but at least I wasn't getting fatter. As I grew up, I mostly tried exercise, from more weights, to yoga (which I still love to this day), Tai Chi (also awesome) and the Couch to 5K program, which I love, but never stuck with. Diet-wise, I've tried and failed at Slim-Fast (awful, hateful stuff), the Hollywood Fast (made it through about 36 of 48 hours), and Herbalife (made me sick to my stomach). The only diet that ever worked for me was Atkins, which did wonders for my energy levels and waistline. The big problem? Meat is EXPENSIVE. So I never stuck with it.
It then asks you to go back to your teen years to reconstruct your weight timeline. Mine is fairly simple. I was about 180 when I was 15, gained about 100 pounds over the course of the next 3 years, and eventually (I think I was actually 20) I leveled out at my current 310ish. No true trigger situation, just a lifetime of poor eating and no exercise combined with hormones. I also have PCOS, so that contributed.
Finally, health issues. Again, PCOS. Also, pre-diabetic insulin resistance, borderline thyroid issues, severe hypertension and possibly whatever is going on with my kidneys.
I'll try to be back tomorrow for chapter 3. Love you guys (especially whoever is reading me in Russia and Germany! That's insanely cool).
Chapter 2 is about the lies that the "diet" industry sells us. They want you to believe that there really is a shortcut, and theirs is the path to salvation from obesity. Then, when it fails, they are right there to sell you a new snake oil because *this time* will be different. I cannot tell you how much this affected me, or for how long. And I know it isn't just me. We are bombarded with so many images of people who succeed on these programs, that the only conclusion we are left with is that *we* are the ones to blame, the ones who failed.
This, friends, is BULLSH*T. The simple truth is that there is no quick fix, no shortcut to health (and really, do I even have to say it? The focus should be on health, NOT weight or size). We are being lied to daily, and we are living the lies as if they are truth. Then why are we failing? Because successful weight loss means we don't need them anymore. A healthier person doesn't need a new miracle diet or pill or surgery. Why would an industry that makes millions off of people with low self-image want to improve that image?
Several questions this chapter. First, what is your image of beautiful? Mine is having a body strong enough to love my hubby, spoil my nieces and nephews and keep my home clean. Caring about myself enough to shower daily (yes, I am depressed and skip days, no, I don't care what you think of that). Being healthy enough to carry my clean laundry up to the second floor from the basement without being winded. Maintaining my loving nature, and developing some humility and patience. My idea of beauty truly comes from the inside.
Next: what diets and such have you tried and how did you do? I played a lot of soccer as a child, also did some weight training at the YMCA. I did well with both, not really getting thinner, but at least I wasn't getting fatter. As I grew up, I mostly tried exercise, from more weights, to yoga (which I still love to this day), Tai Chi (also awesome) and the Couch to 5K program, which I love, but never stuck with. Diet-wise, I've tried and failed at Slim-Fast (awful, hateful stuff), the Hollywood Fast (made it through about 36 of 48 hours), and Herbalife (made me sick to my stomach). The only diet that ever worked for me was Atkins, which did wonders for my energy levels and waistline. The big problem? Meat is EXPENSIVE. So I never stuck with it.
It then asks you to go back to your teen years to reconstruct your weight timeline. Mine is fairly simple. I was about 180 when I was 15, gained about 100 pounds over the course of the next 3 years, and eventually (I think I was actually 20) I leveled out at my current 310ish. No true trigger situation, just a lifetime of poor eating and no exercise combined with hormones. I also have PCOS, so that contributed.
Finally, health issues. Again, PCOS. Also, pre-diabetic insulin resistance, borderline thyroid issues, severe hypertension and possibly whatever is going on with my kidneys.
I'll try to be back tomorrow for chapter 3. Love you guys (especially whoever is reading me in Russia and Germany! That's insanely cool).
27 February 2010
Finding good in everything
God damn, but I am cute. And I mean really cute.
Sure I have my flaws (God, just check out earlier posts *shudder*). But along with the big tummy and lumpy thighs is an amazing set of eyes and nearly perfect lips. I have well shaped calves, pretty ankles, huge tits. I am ADOREABLE.
No this isn't me just being arrogant, nor has it been easy to get to this place. I still rely way too heavily on the input of others to build up my sense of worth, and all it takes is the wrong look from the right person to send me spiralling. But I get up. I see what is good in me. And to Hell with anyone who can't.
It is somewhat more difficult, I know, if you don't have the amazing love and support I get from my family. But if your mom can't see how amazing you are, to Hell with her. If your dad calls you fat, to Hell with him. If your boyfriend or your girlfriend makes you feel like you are anything less than a beautiful person inside and out, you don't need them.
All you need is you, and an ability to see past your flaws to what makes you perfect. In closing I will share one of my favorite pictures I've ever seen.
She is beautiful. So are you. Hugs to all.
10 December 2009
No more day tags
I have lost all ability to tag by the day. This semester has been insane. Chemistry, Biology, Psychology and English. :P On top of that, my aunt passed away just after Thanksgiving, and my brother was arrested. So, yeah, very little time to think, let alone blog.
I just wanted to log on and tell anyone who finds this: YOU ARE AMAZING. The fact that you wake up every morning and get up and live our life is nothing short of a miracle. Some of you have to go to work that you hate, some of you have to deal with too many kids and not enough help, you may have chronic physical pain, or you may have lived through intense mental pain. You may have a great life, or you may have a partner who makes your life harder than it has to be. But if you woke up today, you've been given a new chance!
You are capable of amazing beauty. Caring for your children, partner, parents, friends.... Reaching out to help a stranger.... Volunteering with animals at the shelter.... Picking up some litter.... When you stop to make someone else's day beautiful, it adds to your own sense of worth. I challenge any of you who are having a bad day to get out of your own head and make someone else's day. Then look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself that you are capable of touching another life in a positive way, and that you are beautiful and worthy of love and acceptance.
You are all beautiful. <3 <3 <3
I just wanted to log on and tell anyone who finds this: YOU ARE AMAZING. The fact that you wake up every morning and get up and live our life is nothing short of a miracle. Some of you have to go to work that you hate, some of you have to deal with too many kids and not enough help, you may have chronic physical pain, or you may have lived through intense mental pain. You may have a great life, or you may have a partner who makes your life harder than it has to be. But if you woke up today, you've been given a new chance!
You are capable of amazing beauty. Caring for your children, partner, parents, friends.... Reaching out to help a stranger.... Volunteering with animals at the shelter.... Picking up some litter.... When you stop to make someone else's day beautiful, it adds to your own sense of worth. I challenge any of you who are having a bad day to get out of your own head and make someone else's day. Then look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself that you are capable of touching another life in a positive way, and that you are beautiful and worthy of love and acceptance.
You are all beautiful. <3 <3 <3
11 August 2009
Day 6: Big Girls, You Are Beautiful!
I just wanted to share a video that i adore, that I found when Googling the phrase "big girls are beautiful." The song is by Mika, a British singer who is fabulous. If you get a chance, listen to some of his other stuff. I recommend "Grace Kelly," which is about trying to get people to accept you for who you are, "Relax, Take it Easy," which, near as I can tell, is about devotion and the need to mellow in a relationship, and "Lollipop," which is just fun.
So follow the link to "Big Girl (You Are Beautiful) by Mika.
And remember, no matter who you are, how much you weigh, or what you look like, there is beauty in all of us. Maybe you have a particularly great smile, or kind eyes, an amazing rack (yeah, I said it. Flaunt it girl!). Maybe you have the best hair in the world, or curves that would flip an SUV. Whatever it is, find it, and love it. If you can find even ONE thing about you that is beautiful, you will start learning to see the beauty in the rest of yourself.
This goes for the guys, too.
*MUAH*
So follow the link to "Big Girl (You Are Beautiful) by Mika.
And remember, no matter who you are, how much you weigh, or what you look like, there is beauty in all of us. Maybe you have a particularly great smile, or kind eyes, an amazing rack (yeah, I said it. Flaunt it girl!). Maybe you have the best hair in the world, or curves that would flip an SUV. Whatever it is, find it, and love it. If you can find even ONE thing about you that is beautiful, you will start learning to see the beauty in the rest of yourself.
This goes for the guys, too.
*MUAH*
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